11 Reasons the Greek Gods are Pissed Off

Greek Gods are pissed off

1. Men representing God

No man can represent a God. If no God or Prophet hasn’t bothered returning to earth in the age of television to verify their story, then they’re not divine. This is why the Greek Gods rule, since they’re the only intelligent Gods who didn’t leave behind a holy book written by men.

Don’t trust anyone who says they know the word of God.

An attractive woman representing a God or Goddess is possible. Apollo was ok with it in ancient Delphi, though he only allowed ambiguous or obscure answers to be given on his behalf. The prophesies were always correct. No one doubted this.

Cassandra, one of the daughters of King Priam of Troy, had been gifted with the power to see the future by the God, Apollo. However, after she rejected his advances, Apollo added the cruel twist that even though her prophesies would be true, no one would ever believe her. Today, very unattractive men claim to represent God and to know the future course of events. The sad part is that they have loads of believers. You have to ask yourself, what kind of curse is that?

Thank the Greek Gods for beautiful women.

2. War

If you’re a follower of Ares, God of War, you should know that most of the other Greek Gods don’t like him. This means that if you participate in war, you’re asking for trouble. You may win the war, but you could also lose out on eternal paradise. If you don’t think eternal paradise can’t possibly exit, think again. If this can exist on earth, where do you think the supreme Gods and Goddesses live?

The American’s bombed the peaceful island paradise of Bikini Atoll in the South Pacific with a Nuclear explosive test. They won the war. Now, answer this. Which God would allow everyone who orchestrated that disaster into eternal paradise?

3. Weapons of Mass Destruction

I’ll tell you a parable. The human body wanted to know which part of it was most fit to rule. The brain thought that because of its intelligent, it had the right to rule. The asshole disagreed. It clogged itself up until everyone agreed that it should rule. So the asshole became king.

This is how crazy things can get. If a person invented a weapon that could totally destroy the whole planet with one hit of a button, that person would become king asshole of earth. No man should have that kind of power. Only the Greek Gods have that right.

4. Supremacists

If you’re so supreme, how long do you expect to live on this earth? This is how you piss off the Greek Gods.

5. Smart Asses

I’ll use one of Aesop’s Fables to make you understand the consequence of being a smart ass. One day Hermes wished to learn what men thought about him. To get some insight he disguised himself as a traveller and entered a sculptor’s workshop. After a bit of a look around he saw a statue of Zeus. He asked the sculptor for a price. “One drachma,” said the sculptor. Hermes laughed up his sleeve. “How much for Poseidon over there”, he enquired. The sculptor wanted even more money for Poseidon. Hermes caught eye of his own statue. In his own mind Hermes thought the sculptor would maybe want ten times the amount. After all, he was heaven’s messenger. So he asked for a price once again. “Well”, said the man, “if you give me the asking price for the other two, I’ll throw this one in for nothing.”

6. Hugh Hefner

Mentioning Hugh Hefner’s playboy bunny highlife.

7. Rich as Croesus

This applies to anyone filthy rich. Take note. Croesus was a king of Lydia in central Turkey who ruled sometime around 550 Alpha. Croesus became famous in ancient times for his wealth and power due to the kingdom’s rich natural gold deposits, and from additional tributes given by Greek cities in the west.

The Greeks moralise about how pride comes before a fall. They used to tell the story about the king’s meeting with the Athenian Lawgiver Solon. Solon one day gave the self-satisfied king the famous line: ‘Call no man happy until he is dead’. Solon knew full well that the Greek Gods liked nothing more than to give a man a glimpse of happiness before plunging him into ruin.

Croesus, laughed off the comment at the time, however many years later he was defeated by a Persian army. Taken captive, the story goes that alarmed onlookers heard him cry out “Solon! Solon!”. It ended with he king being burnt alive in his ruined kingdom.

8. A million other things

That’s probably why the Greek Gods haven’t come out yet, though it’s possible to make some pretty good guesses about who the Olympian Gods and Goddesses are.

9-10 Coming soon